goingtobeunwell | IC Inbox

goingtobeunwell

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From:

riseunparalleled

[He's happy to see Crozier eat. He likes a little artistry in presentation, but he dislikes waste far more.]

Of course, especially if they come with money. I know where my talents lie, and I won't turn down compliments on that score.

From:

goingtobeunwell

What about the more sincere ones? If I said, 'you're important and you make me happy', would you accept it or try to downplay the compliment?

[He lets the words hang in the air.]

From:

riseunparalleled

I would say that I'm grateful to have you in my life.

[He gently nudges Crozier with a shoulder.]

I hope I'm not so highhanded as to not believe other people's words on how they feel.

From:

goingtobeunwell

[He laughs softly.]

No, no, nothing like that. Not highhanded, just...humble to the point of frustration.

From:

riseunparalleled

I just try to be... clear-sighted.

People are often far more impressive than they think. Which isn't to say that you don't need other's help, that's often vital... but that's why it's good to know what you can do.

From:

goingtobeunwell

You try to be a pain-in-the-arse, that's what.

[He huffs playfully and takes a bite of the apple.]

It's good to be appreciative of your own strengths and weaknesses, and to understand you're own importance. Not Importance -- nothing so grand as a god, but importance, to someone who may care for you.

From:

riseunparalleled

Hm. But I am a god.

[Fully teasing, complete with an even more innocent look than usual.]

I think that, in many respects, the importance you have for the people who care about you is one of the things that matters most. Expanding the circle wider than that... there are reasons I managed to be demoted so often in the army...

From:

goingtobeunwell

[He nudges him with a smirk.]

It's how you spread yourself too thin, but there are certain roles that require a wide range of compassion for people ambivalent about you.

From:

riseunparalleled

They also don't really like it when you protect enemy civilians.

[He sighs.]

Ambivalence isn't bad. It lets you know people have a reasonable approach.

From:

goingtobeunwell

Ambivalence for a captain can cause a mutiny -- know that one from experience.

[Bloody Hickey. He hopes he's enjoying his tropical island right about now.]

Rather over-extend myself now, I'm afraid.

From:

riseunparalleled

Yeah.

[He'd found many really didn't like his defense of enemy civilians.

He leans his shoulder against Crozier.]

Mm. You take on so much. How far have you stretched yourself, now?

From:

goingtobeunwell

No more than usual. [He accepts his weight - what little there is of it - with a quiet hum.] Wondering mostly how to pick apart our three separate experiences on those ships, and make us all cohesive once more.

Someone on the Galley with a missing hand suffered differently than someone on the Clipper. [Or someone with a missing eye. Guess who's been talking to Gonou.] We're not the same people we once were.

From:

riseunparalleled

The same old responsibilities, captain? [Understanding, rather than teasing.]

We aren't who we once were. But, as much as this was a more drastic break than some, that's always the case. Living in the world, or even slightly outside of it, means we're never who we once were. Sometimes it's more evident when you're just looking at the end results, but I don't think the path to a more cohesive whole is different than it was before.

From:

goingtobeunwell

Just a little added violence and trauma, mn? You may have a point. What divided us wasn't permanent; there's no more struggle than usual.

From:

riseunparalleled

Yeah. After all, even before all this, your experiences weren't the same as Kyoko's weren't the same as Cho Gonou's and so on. Fitting together the different experiences with violence and trauma is always part of our mission. In some ways, this just adds more shared experience, for some.

From:

goingtobeunwell

But it also creates an odd, shared bonding experience. What separates us also brings many of us together here. I just hope the divide isn't too great.

From:

riseunparalleled

[He nods.] But there will always be some who do feel the divide more than others. It's important that we try, but wearing yourself out means that you can help fewer people, not more.

From:

goingtobeunwell

Do you take your own advice from time-to-time? [He laughs softly.]

From:

riseunparalleled

All the time. [He pokes him, gently.] I'm not stretched thin.

From:

goingtobeunwell

Liar. [He leans back against him, smile fond.] Tea's nice. Been a while since we'd done this.

From:

riseunparalleled

Nothing but the truth. I'm too old for that, outside of emergencies. [He runs a hand over Crozier's hair.] A few things have gotten in the way. Different ships. Lack of tea... It's nice to be able to, again.

From:

goingtobeunwell

[The touch is...nice, very nice. Surprising.]

Lack of tea, on both ships. The Brig had water and fish, and little else. [He grunts in fake annoyance.]

From:

riseunparalleled

A great shame. We didn't have tea, but the food was generally very filling, during the time I was there. You could say it was sensible, for rowing, but considering the number of arms they cut off... [He wouldn't say 'sense' was a quality he'd use to describe the place. He keeps gently stroking Crozier's hair, different than he's used to but it can still be neatened a little.]