And here's the worst part of doing this: hurting Francis for his own good. Satisfying, in its way, to know that it helps, keeping Francis' ribs stable and safe while his body can't, but seeing the pain is hard. Hard even though Francis can bear it, though he himself could if he'd had to, and though Francis has borne it this far. He's started to wonder if it's wanting Francis in the way he'd wanted Seetha that's making it feel that way, if some confused part of Raju is feeling that and trying to treat Francis in the way he'd treat a woman in pain like this.
He's been wondering, but hasn't come up with an answer. What he's sure of is that he wants to run his thumbs over the corners of Francis' eyes. He wants to soothe him and wipe away the tears pooling there. But a man has his pride. Raju's already letting himself be gentle in every other way, and Francis thinking Raju doesn't believe he can handle it might hurt him as much as the pain would. But Francis isn't a soldier, doesn't seem to have that particular kind of pride, so maybe Francis would...
Francis needs these bandages finished, more than anything else, so Raju needs to keep his hands to their work.
His eyes flicker up to Francis at the question, and a little of his smile comes back. Francis is still trying to distract himself; he'll need a lot of distracting after the day they've had, and if Raju is going to do that he'll have to stop thinking so much on unanswerable questions and ridiculous things. "I don't know all the places you've sailed to. Have you had mangoes? Mangoes are popular. They'd be a nice break from all these meats and roots."
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He's been wondering, but hasn't come up with an answer. What he's sure of is that he wants to run his thumbs over the corners of Francis' eyes. He wants to soothe him and wipe away the tears pooling there. But a man has his pride. Raju's already letting himself be gentle in every other way, and Francis thinking Raju doesn't believe he can handle it might hurt him as much as the pain would. But Francis isn't a soldier, doesn't seem to have that particular kind of pride, so maybe Francis would...
Francis needs these bandages finished, more than anything else, so Raju needs to keep his hands to their work.
His eyes flicker up to Francis at the question, and a little of his smile comes back. Francis is still trying to distract himself; he'll need a lot of distracting after the day they've had, and if Raju is going to do that he'll have to stop thinking so much on unanswerable questions and ridiculous things. "I don't know all the places you've sailed to. Have you had mangoes? Mangoes are popular. They'd be a nice break from all these meats and roots."